When we experience the pains of rejection, we can unwillingly end up living there. This blogpost is to help you identify if you are seeing through eyes of rejection. These come from personal experience, everything I discuss I have experienced, and I believe experiences can be our greatest teacher, I know it was true for me. If we feel inherently ‘rejected’ by something we can feel cut off and alone. Places look ugly when your ‘alone’ and life can become scary to navigate.
The first sign you may be observing through eyes of rejection is being hypervigilant about it. You can put a lot of energy into reading a room for any signs of potential rejection- a comment, body language, a pause in conversation, it can be anything really. This might not be entirely conscious. But if we find ourselves in a pattern of “noticing” the moods of others and having them shut down our own mood or behavior this is where we are at. Where this really goes left is when this “reading” of situations start to override what is potentially going on. Life is infinite potentials in every moment, and this is like having a pair of blinders on. Did my boss’ pause after I shared that idea really mean she hated it? No, probably not. Your inner narrative should not be overriding the truth of your environment but when we start protecting ourselves from future rejection, we can do that.
The second sign of looking through a lens of rejection is shutting yourself down before you even see if something is possible. Now this is completely internal. When you tell yourself something is not possible, your right. When you tell yourself something is possible you are also right. This can manifest through having a natural talent or even an idea and shutting it down as ‘too out there’ or unrealistic. Not being able to see life in your own desires could also transpire into not seeing it in other people’s which could really strain relationships leading to, you guessed it, rejection.
Going off that- sign three is shutting down what makes you different. Seeing things about yourself that makes you appear different make you veer away from the crowd instead of seeing those qualities as an asset. Have you heard the quote, if you feel you do not fit in this world it is because you are here to create a new one? Same concept but this can play out on all scales too like not speaking up when you see something does not make sense to you or not sharing your ideas with the group. The truth is leaders are different from the crowd, change makers must break away from the ‘group thought’ to lead it in a different direction. Without this there would be no evolution.
Well at this point we’re kind of writing everyone off as an asshole and don’t think our truest essence is going to get to see the light of day but we still want to go for things, we still have needs and wants right? The fourth sign of looking at things through the eyes of rejection can be believing we can only achieve things through force. As if life is this battlefield and if we want something we must then armor up and fight for it. When something becomes such a need our ego is taking over and operating from a fear of not having that thing. We think we are going to be rejected from the very things that we want. This can be a relationship or any goal and in that case the universe makes us do what is so hard, let it go. This isn’t punishment, it’s the result of self-rejection. When we abandon our own well-being for something outside of ourselves, we have to be returned to ourselves as painful as that lesson may be, but it stems from sensing potential rejection.
Do you think past experiences of rejection have affected the way you look at things? Leave your experience in the comments below, we would love to hear from you and subscribe if you enjoyed this kind of content so we can make more. Thanks for reading, love will heal this world and it starts with us.
If you want to learn more about how your rejection is affecting you, click here to check out our course “Healing Your Rejection Wounds By Honoring Your Ancestors”